The burden and stress of this semester has manifested itself into a no-holds barred freak out session that has lasted since the beginning of April. I am about to enter my last year of undergraduate study with no real plans after graduation.
The young man I'm seeing seems to think this means all I want to do is follow him, marry him and pop out a few of his kids. This is not the case but with no real plans of my own, I can see how he'd worry that he is holding me back. But from what? Not even I know. That's the problem.
When a problem roots itself in your school, professional and social life, it must be significant. I needed a change.
So I made a resolution to immerse myself in something that matters to me. I'm starting small...I picked up Foreign Policy and The Economist today and have decided to invest in a subscription. Thumbing through the pages reading about the world's problems not only makes my own seem miniscule but also encourages me to work towards solving those meaningful and substantial issues.
I'd like to keep this up. Maybe I'll even spend some of my day in silence reflecting on things like The Colonic. Whatever the case, I hope this little change can help make bigger ones...
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3 comments:
I understand the feeling. I am pretty much in a complete quarter life crisis. We just have to find excitement in the ambiguity!
I can say from experience, not knowing what you want to do in your early 20's is completely normal. Don't sweat it, and enjoy the ride of uncertainty. When you have it all figured out is when you'll appreciate times like you're experiencing now.
Don't worry hang in there! I am graduating and going to graduate school and still don't really have a firm idea of what I want to do. You'll be fine...the Economist is really good reading!
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